What does love mean to you? Maybe red roses and romantic dinners, boxes of chocolates and a beautiful necklace?
Or hugs and belonging, care and support, guidance and togetherness, reliability and trust, respect and honesty, communication and loyalty, safety or comfort.
List the aspects which are important for you.
It’s worth thinking about who in your life loves you.
Which particular friends make your heart smile? Note their name. What about special family members? How about your pets? There’s absolutely usually someone who cares. What do you think each loves about you? Perhaps you could even ask them if you’re not sure. Find three things. And then you have a good starting point to think about your positive qualities, the qualities others love in you. Maybe you feel a little better about yourself knowing who loves you too.
Do you love yourself enough is another question worth considering.
This is absolutely fundamental in feeling good about who you are, having positive self-worth and esteem, making effective decisions and helpful choices and being in the right relationships.
It’s another helpful thing to take a few minutes to really sit and think about what others would gain from being with you. Your positive qualities of course. Perhaps you are funny or caring, kind or smart, a decision maker or an organizer, creative or artistic, imaginative or logical, witty or rational, thoughtful or generous, musical or great at DIY, capable or able, sensitive or strong. Whoever you are, embrace all your loveliness and personality.
What about your successes now. List what you’ve achieved in your life. Everything which you have worked hard at and felt proud about. Maybe your driving test or school or other qualifications.
How about a promotion or buying your first car or home? A holiday abroad or exploring a new city. Have you done a presentation or received great feedback about something you’ve achieved. List them all. Big and small.
And what challenges have you faced and dealt with in your lifetime. Think about what that tells you about yourself. Perhaps your strength or resilience, your perseverance or courage, your tenacity, and positivity.
And finally, think about your physicality. What parts of your appearance are ok or good and aspects you feel good about? A nice haircut or eyes, a healthy body or well-groomed look, clothes which suit your body shape and colouring, perhaps a friendly smile.
Now, you have a true picture of who you are, what’s not to love!
So buy something special to remind you of all that is good about being you, partner or no partner. And be thankful of those close to you who really care.
Here’s to finding love from within as a starting point to finding love outside.
This post first appeared on Personal Growth.